It’s Not Perfect, But It Sure Is Beautiful

It doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful

How often do we run around like crazy people trying to get everything perfect? I mean seriously…think about it.

This applies to so many aspects of our lives. Whether it be the homemaker wanting her house to be spotless all the time…nice and tidy, nothing out of place, laundry baskets always empty, cookies in the oven, “Are you kidding? Who touched the throw pillows?”. Ready for Martha to stop by at a moments notice. (Raising hand) I don’t think Martha is coming. All the while missing the laughter that barrels through the door, the snuggles on the couch, the talks on the porch…the life around us.

We may criticize the hair out of place in a photo…”take it again…my muffin top is showing”. Instead of looking deeper at the love and laughter that is truly shown in the memory. I mean, honestly, 20 years from now that muffin top will be the least of our worries.

Ahhh, perfect kiddos….little cherubs. Do you have those? Didn’t think so. Me either. Comforting to know that we are all in the same boat on this one. Mine, all 5, have gotten in trouble, caused me to lose sleep, given me gray hair, said things that shocked me, and have filled my heart with more love and joy than I could have ever imagined.

And, then came marriage. It’s always amazing to me when a couple gets divorced, and everyone looks so surprised. “But, they were the PERFECT couple!” Really, people? Is there such a thing?
John and I are about as far from perfect as we can get. What we are is committed to our marriage. Committed to doing whatever it takes to make this wonderful sometimes-crazy difficult partnership work. It means looking past the little stuff…socks on the floor…and savoring the stuff that matters….John rubbed my feet while I lay shaking in an MRI last week.
Marriage is a constant work in process, and I am a firm firm believer that you get what you give. Handle your partnership gently, nurture it, and be prepared to work on it daily. Think about it…you wouldn’t plant a garden at the beginning of spring and come back at the end of the season expecting beautiful fruits and veggies. No, you would tend it lovingly; daily…and you would reap your rewards. Marriage is no different. Put the love of your life as a top priority; love them with your whole being. It’s the beautiful nuances of a relationship that will see you through…not the grandiose gestures.

None of us, nothing we have, or anything we do will ever be perfect. But, there is absolute beauty all around us…in the people we love, the home we create, and the lives we live.

Its not perfect, but it sure is beautiful.

Summer Is Like That

Summer is like that: Amy Hafele

August to me is a FOUR letter word. Oh, I suppose I could look at it as beginning of sorts; a Genesis if you will. I know, I know a new school year is about to start. The retailers have been warning of this day of doom with bigger than life pencils swinging from the ceiling…casting shadows on our summer since school let out. Backpacks have been purchased, school supplies are filling the aisles, calls for registration are on my voicemail. I deleted them immediately. I even heard a little excitement in Pickle’s voice when asked about going to 7th grade.

We have 21 days left…21 days.

I crave my children; their toothy grins, and their warm smell as they come down for the first hug of the day. Even if it’s almost 10. Summer allows me to slow down and take notice of the little things…like the fact that they grew almost an inch in their sleep.

These days of summer…they are truly the best. Having quiet talks with kids over a lazy breakfast. Nothing hurried. Just connecting. Listening. Summer is like that. Taking in their sweet smell as they lay their head on my shoulder at the movies. Summer is like that. We’ve hung out and played games, made cookies almost everyday, and truly enjoyed each other. Summer is like that. We’ve made pallets on the floor, and had movie nights; complete with a concession stand. No planned menus…Smoothies anyone? Who wants to make pizza? Summer is like that. We even took a trip to Japan with Sushi night served seated on the living room floor; complete with chopsticks. Summer is like that. Swimming until their fingers are pruny and the moon is full. Dinner with the neighbors on the patio…even if it’s not the weekend. Summer is like that. Splashing in fountains, picking blackberries, water balloon fights. Yes. Summer is like that.

Maybe it’s me, but we seem to laugh more, hold hands more, hug more, sing more, connect more, say “Yes” more…Summer is like that.

Summer is like that: Amy Hafele Summer is like that: Amy Hafele

I know school is a necessary, but man does it bring me down. Maybe it’s not just school. It’s the whole school “package”. With school comes a schedule (I know…a necessary evil), homework, extracurricular activities, Science projects, socks, meetings, fixing hair, social activities, social anxieties, getting dressed, college, lunches, carpool, tests, dioramas, PTA, standardized tests, bullies, bedtimes, fundraisers, the Sunday blues, laundry, alarm clocks… There are only 24 hours in a day.

Panicked, I wonder if we have etched out enough family time in this fleeting 2 1/2 months of summer. Did we snuggle enough? Talk enough? Reconnect enough? Slow down enough? Eat enough snow cones? Did we make enough memories? Will this carry us through the drought that is sure to follow during the school year?

21 more days….I will be seizing these diems!!! Whether my kiddos like it or not I will be holding their hands, smelling them, loving on them, laughing with them, snuggling with them…every moment I get for the next 21 days. I will be filling our cups up to the brim, so that when the school year starts to chip away at us we can quench our thirst for love and comfort.

All We Have is Now

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Where are your thoughts centered? On yesterday…the past; words you wished you’d said, steps you should have taken, choices you wish you’d never made. Or, are you looking to tomorrow…constantly thinking about something that doesn’t exist, worrying about the “what if’s” of tomorrow.

The only time we are guaranteed is right now…this very mine. And, by focusing on yesterday and tomorrow we are giving that away. I have really been preoccupied lately…well, this year 2015, with getting to the root of what brings me joy. True joy. Living in the moment has been one of the biggest changes that I have made, and one of the biggest challenges. When you are type A, move at 100 miles an hour, have “to do” lists for your “to do” lists this can be difficult. I’ll be honest I haven’t perfected it, but the times that I do it makes all the difference. I enjoy my husband and children more, I notice the subtle things about myself that make me a better person. I notice the most precious parts of my life. Like last night…I hung outside with the kids instead of unloading the dishwasher and folding clothes. I stopped. I breathed. I was present. (The dishes and clothes are still there 😁)

Yesterday happened, and I hope I will see tomorrow, but for now I’m just going to enjoy today.

xoxo

Amy

#liveauthentically #liveinthemoment #family #wecandohardthings #savor #mammalove #mindfulness #now